(Source: confessionsabouteatingdisorders)
22814) I thought he wanted more than sex but he’s just like the other boys at this school. We’ve been sleeping together for months now and it makes me feel awful about myself because I don’t know his true feelings about me. We don’t talk about feelings, we get high, watch movies and have sex. I like him so much but I can’t ask him how he feels about me because I don’t want to lose him. I’m hoping that if I lose more and more and more and more and more weight, maybe he’ll have to talk about his feelings. I want him to be concerned because I don’t know how else to find out what he’s feeling.
9798) I’m starting to realize that I’m not restricting because I hate my body. I always thought that was why, and once I liked my body I would stop. But now I’m realizing that it is about control. When someone hurts my feelings, I don’t eat. When my boyfriend makes me jealous, I don’t eat. When I feel left out or unwanted, I don’t eat. And the more I go through this life, the more reasons I find to not eat. And this will never end.
(Source: confessionsabouteatingdisorders)
